I remember that day well… I was 16, diligently cutting an entire pair of jeans into very short shorts. That day I was supposed to go to the Ministry of the Interior to get my ID and I planned to celebrate this event with a new look. When I left the room, my mother looked at me and said in her characteristic quiet tone: “Hagit, it does not look good.”
“Why not?” I answered the question, and immediately continued with a fiery speech in my defense: “I am a free woman and can wear whatever I feel like! If someone does not like it, or it bothers them, it’s their problem! And besides… it’s hot outside!”
My mother did not argue with me. I think she believed that there are things I need to experience for myself, in order to reach the right conclusions, and she also relied on my intuition, that would keep me away from evil and lead me, in the end, to choose what is best and right for me, and so it was.
I was on my way to the Ministry of the Interior, when consciously my provocative attire was an expression of freedom and the warm weather. But in my subconscious, it was clear to me that I wanted to attract the attention of males or more precisely to find the prince on the white horse, who, just like the story of Cinderella, would find me thanks to my shapely, tanned legs.
But I found that reality is often very far from fairy tales and instead of meeting the prince, I met with the lustful looks of men (some of whom are older than my father!), I felt objectified, I felt as if their thoughts were polluting and undermining my confidence! And so, as I stood in line, I pulled on my T-shirt as much as I could so that it covered as much of my nakedness as possible, and I could not wait for the moment when I would get home and get rid of this mistake.
When I look at teenage girls today, I wonder how long it will take (if at all) for their female intuition to make them realize that the provocative photos they upload to Instagram and the minimal clothing they wear when they go out dancing until dawn, is not exactly a compliment to their femininity and certainly not the way to attract into their lives a man who will truly love them. (And not only ones who want to go to bed with them…)
But with your permission, I’ll go back to my personal story.
It has been several years since the story of the shorts, and I – in my search for the answers to the great questions of life – have found myself in the orthodox world of Judaism.
There I came across modest women: with long skirts, sleeves that cover the elbows and various hair covers. There are (almost) no temptations in this society, but neither is there much beauty. Because behind wide clothes and head scarves, there was often neglect and also complications in everything related to sexual pleasure.
This was not the main reason for why I left, after many years the World of Halacha (Jewish law), but the fact that this world doesn’t attach importance to beauty, only added to it. Why is beauty something that has always been very important to me? I think Plato answered it most aptly when he explained that love of beauty is like love of good, needs no explanation.
At last, I found the female beauty model that resonated with my soul frequency and since then I have only been developing it.
I discovered it in the journalist Azriel Carlebach’s book “India” in which he compares the beauty and aesthetics of the Indian woman to the European one:
“… The Indian woman turns her charms inside and out. Her beauty does not present but – promises, does not show but – implies. Does not appeal to her flesh but to mystery. The European woman offers herself as if in a lighted display window, while the Indian woman stands beyond the window of her house in semi-darkness…
As she approaches, her head is raised high and pure, her eyes are black and deep, on her cheeks you can see innocence and on her lips a smile that never tasted sin, -But she is not getting closer but to teach you how far she is. And as she walks past you, proud, upright, in her graceful nobility, her head bare and her body covered from her neck to her sandals, her cosmetics fading and whispering still – and in passing she has not thrown you a single hint to all her riddles.
It’s possible she knows the secret; she knows men want the secret. She knows that he too is looking for the unobtainable, that which is hidden from the experience evading any expression and description. It is possible and she feels that her exterior is not her essence, and perhaps the gods revealed the secret to her, because the body is nothing but a corridor to the hall of love. “
Such majestic beauty, a beauty that evokes in a man the desire for something higher, is not only the result of external cultivation but an expression of inner beauty, beauty of the soul. And this is the secret of the beauty of a queen woman: beautiful on the inside and beautiful on the outside. The uniqueness of her soul is also reflected in her style of dress. A queen woman is not looking for brands but designs and chooses her clothing and jewelry details according to her very personal style. Queen women do not dress the same. They are very authentic but can be identified by their nobility, the harmony between who they are and how they look, and especially by their shining eyes. The eyes are the mirror of the soul and therefore the beauty of a queen woman has no limits of age, because the beauty of the soul has no limit.